Sunday, October 6, 2019

Vulnerability as Main Taste of Christian doctrine

This is the post which make me hate many regulations in Indonesia that does not allow me to speak in way I believe! It is easily exploited and do a micromanagement of each people faith and thoughts. 

I wish Indonesia would delete all the restricting free speech regulation and allow people to promote their own faith as far as not coercing the lifestyle with violence and threat. 

In comparative story of Solomon, genesis and other book, I found that different Abrahamic religion taught a slight different flavor of what it is, making them different religion on their own.
Even though, we all believe in divine revelation, there's several thing in a way I found it interesting. Christian as a main doctrine in the West has not been cherished so much it is used to. Even though, the Christian way of life is becoming more universal in western philosophy.

From my point of view, I feel pre-Christian* basic is more about promise - a longing wish. Even though Christian is notorious in waiting of the return of Christ, in fact I always feel this savior thing is more close to pre-Christian. After all in Christian theology, we already know the savior.
On the other, post-Christian* way is a complete and perfect way, which means also micromanagement to a deeper level. Because the premise is perfection, I am somehow baffled how post-Christian story weave story of Solomon, David and other king/prophet into a really divine, infallible sacred people. It feels wrong to criticize prophets and it is taken as a grand of perfection. Even the last prophet is deemed as the most perfect man.

The perfectionist approach of post-Christian is really promising and also unrealistic
Because whatever they say as perfect, it is never actually under scope. What is definition of perfect in that way? Infallible? Most of the time, it is the interpretation, perfection is infallible.

Even though there are actions which we say is amoral and a sin, it is still seen as perfection.

And the saddest thing is we're living in an imperfect, fallible world.
The Christian way is very weird and many atheist will say stupidly magical. The God which is mocked as unnecessary person in history that died in humiliated way. It is a common despise for many people to mock Christian God.

However, it is something that makes it unique. It embraces imperfection
I am so surprised that there are many Christians, who are still thinking people who act as 'main character' in each book as an example. After finishing old and new testament, I never feel that it is the purpose from the first place. Every story in old testament is more like every failure of man and the broken relationship of God and human. The imperfection, sin, dispute of man what makes it felt like made out of fabric of this world.
If we were scrolling through answer about what is the most disgusting thing in bible, there will be many people list story of Lot and her daughters, Leviticus law, etc. It is funny to think that actually many people both Christian and not Christian, would consider that it should be done just because it is written in 'Holy Book'. Catholic rigid academic approach is more appropriate to lay base why the story is included in the first place.

In fact the main theme of old testament even get stronger in new testament, it is about vulnerability. Even God as Son of Man is vulnerable. The one people can mock up to this point.

Vulnerable is seen as weakness. I always think amongst Abrahamic religion, Christian way is the weakest and stupidest. We man, always aspire to be God, to be perfect. Then, why a holy book put so much story of failure of men? How can a man so weak weave a history and setting moral foundation?

I asked it to Jesslyn once. I got the typical answer of Christian girl. I know it but I never 'memaklumi itu'
But the more I grow into a person, I began to recognize myself. I am always striving for perfection and even try not to show my tears. I hid my background, I hid my house, I never invite someone there, because I am actually very afraid of judgement and being vulnerable in front of anyone. While, my deepest heart yearn for someone I can trust even in my most vulnerable term.

After all, a man is weak, mortal, and vulnerable. There is no perfect man but we hate our weakness, mortality, and vulnerability as a man. In the story of other gods, we always strive to overcome it and become what we are not, a God. It is the story of Adam and Eve. If we want to march forward and really transcend ourselves, do we need to be perfect?

Maybe we need to be but to be perfect, whatever we mean it is, we should never avoid our weakness and pretend we're not vulnerable. By absolving the fact we're just flesh and can be killed, can be seduced, can be angered, can be humiliated, I think it is the biggest strength of all. To swallow our ego and be ourselves, a human.

*Pre Christian and Post Christian is used not to make this blog a bait for bigot.

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